Corrupt a wish!

[wallyweb]

Your Lego wish is corrupted by some enterprising mice who grab all of the bricks and build a prison around the sleeping cat.

I wish the New Year wasn't starting out with a blizzard on the very first day.

[Expresso]

Now there's no blizzard, however it's a nice crisp 50°C.

[NoMorePacers]

I wish that you would have a wish.

[Expresso]

I have, however it's quite negative for you.

I wish for a quantum singularity.

[NoMorePacers]

You get a quantum doublarity instead.

I wish they would use Class 373s on the ECML again.

[kamnet]

They decide to run the Class 99 instead.

I wish to win the next mega lottery.

[NoMorePacers]

You win the next mega lottery, but as everyone else in the US wins as well, you only get $2 in winnings.

I wish to be able to drink Coca-Cola again.

[Expresso]

Your stomach is eaten away by the acid you confuse for cola.

I wish to experience fun.

[kamnet]

You experience a "fun Gus". You thought you were eating an edible mushroom but instead you got very sick.

I wish the government would stop messing with my health insurance.

[NoMorePacers]

Donald Trump comes to personally award you free lifetime insurance. However, it is insurance that means you become his personal slave for the rest of your life, and you must do tasks that even include washing him and wiping his bottom.

I wish to be Donald Trump.

[Expresso]

You are assassinated by your own personal slave over your disgusting habits.

I wish to be motivated to pick up programming.

[kamnet]

The only programming you get motivated to pick up is "Real Housewives of Atlanta".

I wish these chicken wings and fries wern't so delicious! I can't stop eating them!

[NoMorePacers]

You never stop eating them and you become obese.

I wish I would have my breakfast.

[ChillCore]

You get your proper breakfast ... a proper english one and your poopyhole does not support it ...
You spend the next three days on the toilet while losing 25 kilos and nearly die of dehydration.

I wish for time to roll back to 1980 ... and Social Warrior Justice to never exist in the first place ... Eat Poo Anita and purple hair 'I ate 5 burgers' chick.

[Expresso]

It's 1980 now and SWJ types don't exist. You are treated extremely unjust and nobody will do something in your defense.

I wish to have a better fridge.

[NoMorePacers]

You get a better fridge - but it is full of novichok.

I wish to ride a Class 800.

[Expresso]

It details and you are killed.

I wish for a fridge which doesn't contain a poisonous substance.

[wallyweb]

You get your wish, then the dog kicks the door closed shoving you into the fridge and you catch pneumonia while waiting for somebody to let you out.

I wish Al Gore was right and all this snow would melt.

[kamnet]

All the snow melts and instead you're flooded.

I wish I had more of those delicious wings.

[wallyweb]

You get your wish but now you must explain all those flightless pigeons running around your house.

I wish Al Gore was wrong and all this water would freeze.